A colleague was upset that her partner did not want to sell their place and move into a different community. “How can he not see the benefits of moving? It is so frustrating!” She was pessimistic about the future, which strained their relationship. However, she tried to be open to what may unfold. A short while later, she was brimming with excitement. “I am so excited and so glad we didn’t sell.” She joined a house-sharing program. Since she lives near a university, a family quickly booked her home for the trips to drop their son off at college and the related visits, likely for the next few years. In return, my colleague will be visiting Italy for the house exchange. The transaction was very cost-effective and the prospect of international travel is a joy.
We all know that life is filled with uncertainties and unexpected turns. I have spent a lot of time and energy in my life trying to gain a sense of control. I worked hard and experienced stress.
Adopting an optimistic view of what is unfolding has been a game-changer for me. I have come to appreciate the ebb and flow of life and that things are constantly changing. Cultivating this Open Stance posture has helped me to be more in the present moment and experience more joy.
We have a negative confirmation bias and an instinct to survive that has us wired to look for what is harmful and what could go wrong. Now, I reframe setbacks and difficulties as opportunities for learning and growth. I look for what is possible.
Reflecting on the challenges in my younger years, I can now see benefits. For example, I had to work from an early age to pay for college without any support. The work experience built my confidence, and I learned to be a manager and leader early. I learned to trust my ability to overcome obstacles. Opportunities emerged for me.
Look for examples of how resilient you were in the face of challenges and setbacks. Use these examples to remind you of your courage and how life can unfold. Be kind and self-compassionate. Challenges are a part of living. Look for the opportunities and what is possible. Allow yourself to be hopeful and resilient.
Emotions are contagious, and we need more people to focus on hope and what is possible during this time in our world.