For much of my life, I worked tirelessly to anticipate and manage everything in my path. I believed control was the key to peace, yet the more I grasped, the more I found myself tangled in worry. Stress was a constant companion. Over time, I realized something: worry is like running on a treadmill—exhausting but going nowhere. Still, letting go of old habits has not come quietly.
I’ve learned the power of noticing. When my mind starts racing and I feel the familiar grip of anxiety, I pause. I step back, observe the thoughts, and notice the tightness in my body—the subtle contraction, the closing in. Then I cool down. With a calm nervous system, I can shift into a wider stance, one I call an Open Stance, where I entertain possibilities I couldn’t see before.
This practice didn’t begin with significant life events. It started with the small things—when a project didn’t go as planned, I lost an assignment, or I faced disappointment. In those moments, I noticed the contraction. I acknowledged my expectations of how life “should” unfold. I stepped back, took a breath, and was kind to myself. I reminded myself to see the bigger picture, to reflect on what was still going well. And slowly, I began to ask, “What good might come from this?”
Then, life handed me something more significant—a family member was diagnosed with a brain tumor. At first, it seemed inoperable. Our hearts sank into uncertainty. But then, surgery became an option. It wasn’t an easy path. It took an immense effort to remain open. We still don’t know the future. But here’s the thing: none of us ever really do. We all know our days are limited, yet we often live as if they are infinite.
In the midst of uncertainty, I’ve discovered that embracing what is with an open heart offers more than clinging to what was. There’s a quiet strength in appreciating what we have, even when the path ahead is unclear. There is always room for optimism—sometimes only a crack, but enough for light to slip through.
This experience has shifted my perspective. The things that once loomed large—a delayed flight, a minor disappointment—now feel smaller, more manageable. And when I’m open, I notice more. I find opportunities that weren’t visible when I was consumed with fear or frustration.
We can’t control every outcome, but we can control how we show up. We can choose to face uncertainty with clarity and courage. We can choose to be kind to ourselves and to others. In doing so, we create space for grace, learning, and possibility of something better than we imagined.
We know we are facing uncertainty these days. With an Open Stance, ideally, we will see more options and choose strategies that work for us and others.
Uncertainty is inevitable, but thriving is a choice.
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