How Do We Manage the Pain Around Us?

So many people have shared their pain with me this week. A newborn grandchild is in intensive care with an uncertain future. Another is facing the aftermath of a hurricane, and their town is devastated. People are still waiting for help. Another ended a long-time relationship. Another has a severe health scare. While another experienced an unexpected death in their family. Someone’s spouse is losing cognitive capacity, and finances are tight. Others have lost their long-held positions as their company downsizes. Some are worried about political polarization and the election aftermath. I could go on, as I know you can.

How do you respond to such pain of others? I am compassionate and often feel moved to action. I donate to some causes, but it feels like it is not enough. Of course, I listen to people and let them know they are in my thoughts and prayers. And they certainly are. I feel a heavy heart for the suffering.

Actually, listening without judgment is a powerful act of empathy, allowing us to connect deeply and provide solace to those experiencing grief, sadness, anger, and other emotions. Being with them is essential. We are interconnected, and it is easy to feel alone during challenging times. Showing our care and concern is valuable. While it can be hard to know what to say, simply being with someone who is in pain, giving empathy, and letting them know we care matters. In addition, I find that sending an email or a text message telling a person they are in my thoughts supports me and them.

It is also important not to get burned out. I used to believe I could not be at ease when others were suffering, and this belief cost me. I stayed in a stress and worry state for too long.

I don’t have everything figured out. Knowing that I am doing my best to listen and be there for others has helped me. In addition, I know that I am doing my part to make life better for others. If we each did something, it could really make a difference for us and others. Research actually shows that those who volunteer or are of service to others experience more positivity.

I am working on recognizing what is mine to do. I focus on asking others how I can be of support rather than taking over, which is a pattern I learned in my youth. I recognize that often, just being there is enough. Of course, where feasible, I offer suggestions and offer other resources for help. I share my own experiences when asked.

Of course, we need to protect our own wellbeing or we cannot benefit others. You can’t pour from an empty cup. Be sure to attend to your own emotional needs and take care of yourself amid the rhythm and pain of life.

I am writing a book with a colleague, Gila Seritcioglu, and teach courses on joy. We recognize that suffering and challenges are a part of life. We need to acknowledge our feelings and give ourselves and others empathy. We have coined the term JOYBeing to mean the joy of being. It is an invitation to connect with the joy of being alive, even during challenging times and to be on the lookout for moments of connection, joy and meaning. I try to notice the beauty around me such as the green trees turning yellow and orange and the blue sky and the sunny day–even amid all the pain and sorrow. I appreciate hearing a moment of triumph from a coaching client.

Managing others’ pain requires balancing empathy with self-care. How do you navigate this delicate balance? Please take care of yourself as you listen with compassion and support for others.

Kindly, share your experiences and insights on how you manage the pain of others in the comments below.

Navigating Family Polarization: Finding Connection Amid Political Divide

Recently, I have been deeply moved by the countless stories shared by coaching clients, colleagues, neighbors, and friends. The pain they feel due to political polarization is not a solitary experience but a global phenomenon. Families, once a source of support, now find themselves in a state of estrangement and anger. The question that echoes in many minds is: How can someone I care about perceive the world so differently? There are pressures to choose our “team”. This situation is profoundly painful and complex, often leading to a sense of disconnection from our loved ones as the only viable option.

Many are paying attention to social media and other forms of media that reinforce a specific view, making it hard to see other perspectives or to be open to learning. In fact, our own “team” could criticize or ostracize us if we entertain different views.

The Challenge of Polarization

We often view our own perspective as principled while seeing the other side as driven by narrow self-interest. The instinctive reaction is to argue, hoping to change the other person’s mind. However, this only escalates the argument and increases stress. When someone disagrees with us, we assume they are making us wrong, and we naturally become defensive. Some resort to sending articles or asking other family members to intervene, but this approach rarely works. Often, both sides interpret the same facts differently, leading to even more division.

A Personal Perspective

I have witnessed this kind of polarization both in the workplace and within families. Personally, I grew up with parents who saw the world through very different lenses. This lifelong experience has driven my quest to understand how we can foster open-mindedness. This question is at the core of my work and the OASIS Conversations process and the Open Stance postures model, which have been tested successfully worldwide over the past few decades. I have benefitted from listening and trying to understand how someone comes to their views and why they are important to them.

The Path to Openness

The journey towards resolving polarization begins with a profound self-awareness. It’s crucial to recognize that our backgrounds and experiences shape our perspectives. We need to become aware of our judgments and acknowledge when we are not open to listening and learning. By catching these reactions, we can shift our mindset to one of openness. From this state, we can genuinely listen with curiosity and compassion. When we are open and empathetic, we are more likely to find common ground and often co-create solutions. It is helpful to ask people to share their personal stories rather than debating abstract political views. We can focus on respecting others. This journey is not just about reconnecting with our loved ones, but also about personal growth and understanding. There is power in simply being open and listening. We may agree to politely agree to disagree and appreciate the other’s conviction. When people feel unheard or silenced or labelled, there is little hope of moving forward.

Practical Steps to Foster Connection

– Start with Self-Awareness: Notice your judgments and reactions. Recognize when you are not open to listening. Take a time-out, if needed. Remind yourself, “I don’t know what I don’t know” and there are multiple perspectives.

– Shift to Openness: Make a conscious effort to be open-minded. Approach conversations with curiosity, humility, and a willingness to understand.

– Listen with Empathy: Genuinely listen to the other person’s perspective. Show empathy and acknowledge their emotions.

– Seek Common Ground: Identify areas of agreement and shared values. Use these as a foundation to build understanding.

– Appreciate Differences: Recognize and appreciate the unique qualities of the other person. This doesn’t mean you have to agree, but it shows respect.

The Bigger Picture

Ultimately, we are all members of this nation and planet and benefit from creating environments where multiple perspectives are valued. By choosing to build relationships and engage in open-minded conversations, we contribute to a more connected and understanding world. Engaging in non-political activities with family members and colleagues, such as a meal or a community project, can help emphasize our common humanity.

Your Role and Invitation

I encourage you to embrace the challenge of engaging in open-minded and open-hearted conversations during these trying times. It is useful to brush up on your listening skills and recall your intention to be respectful. Take care of yourself too.

Organizations like Braver Angels and Living Room Conversations are providing options for civil discourse, where participants can understand other people’s perspectives. Such forums are ways to expand our perspective about other people’s views.

I know this is a challenging time for all of us. Be sure to get empathy from others.

Share what you are learning and the strategies that work for you. Together, we can navigate this polarization and find ways to reconnect with those we care about.

You are welcome to receive sample chapters of OASIS Conversations here: https://forms.aweber.com/form/59/1587493659.htm

How Do You Start Your Day?

I have my phone near my bed since my daughter, who lives in another city, tends to call late, and I want to be available for her. I know keeping your phone in a room where you don’t sleep is recommended.

I noticed that I started a pattern of reviewing my email before I even got out of bed. It is easy to start flooding our system with a focus on what we must do and the day’s stress. I had to catch myself. I feel more connected with myself and more energized when I follow a different routine.

I have worked to develop a routine that helps me feel energized for the day. This routine has significantly improved my focus, productivity, and overall wellbeing. I am not rigid, but I try to incorporate some key areas. I encourage the leaders I work with to develop a routine to start their days effectively. When we create such patterns, we feel more grounded.

I start my day by reviewing my purpose and a sense of gratefulness for the day. I review key areas such as physical health, psychological health, relationships, work, friendships, and creativity and envision how I hope to be and grow in these realms. I walk up stairs or do some form of exercise such as pilates or strength training. I read or listen to audiobooks or podcasts for inspiration while I exercise. Finally, I briefly write about what I am grateful for and the moments of joy and meaning I experienced the day before. Journaling helps me to notice patterns and appreciate my life. I take a few minutes to breath and be mindful. When possible, I try to step outside for a few minutes, too.

I can incorporate most of these areas in a short period while I get ready for the day; sometimes, I am able to devote more time to reflection. The key is taking some moments to get centered and for ourselves before we jump into our daily activities. Remember, the routine is flexible and can be adapted to suit your needs and schedule, empowering you to take control of your day from the very start.

Of course, you may create space for yourself when you complete your work day, during lunch, or before you go to sleep. The key is to build a routine that strengthens you.

What process have you developed or would like to create to start your day or connect with yourself? I encourage you to share your routines and experiences, as we can all learn from each other and grow together.

Embracing Our Multifaceted Self: A Path to Authentic Leadership

As leaders, we often focus on external achievements and professional challenges. However, true leadership also involves looking inward and embracing the multifaceted nature of our inner selves. Being open to the various parts of ourselves allows us to lead with authenticity, empathy, and resilience.

Each of us is composed of numerous internal parts, each with its voice, perspective, and needs. These parts can include an inner critic, a part that nurtures, a part that focuses on achievement, etc. Acknowledging and understanding these parts and appreciating their apparent competing demands is essential for personal growth and effective leadership.

To lead authentically, we must integrate these various parts into a cohesive whole. This involves acknowledging each part’s voice, understanding its role, and harmonizing its contributions to our overall wellbeing.

Practicing self-compassion is a powerful way to embrace and integrate our inner parts. By extending the same kindness to ourselves that we offer to others, we create an internal environment of acceptance and understanding. For example, When faced with a setback, acknowledge your efforts instead of being overly critical and remind yourself that mistakes are part of the learning process.

Engaging in an open dialogue with our inner parts can help us understand their needs and motivations. This process involves listening to each part without judgment and finding ways to address their concerns. Set aside time for self-reflection, where you can journal or reflect on the voices and needs of your inner parts.

Being open to our inner parts requires vulnerability. It means acknowledging our fears, insecurities, and limitations. However, this vulnerability is a source of strength, allowing us to connect more deeply with ourselves and others. It’s okay to be human.

I have been conscious of noticing the tension between different parts of me. I have a part that wants to be productive and get things done and another part that wants to enjoy the beautiful weather outside and experience a sense of calm. It is easy to favor one or the other at different times. Sometimes, I have numbed or shut off the part that wants to relax and push ahead with the work. Of course, this often serves me, and I can be productive.

Instead of favoring one part and shutting off another, I have practiced noticing the different parts and appreciating that each part has unique perspectives, needs, and desires. I know that a large part of me, my Wise Self, can hold the various parts with compassion. From this broader perspective, I can say, “I sense something in me desires to be productive, and I sense something in me would like to be outside enjoying nature.” I can internally make room for all the apparent competing parts within me and sense my wholeness. This balance brings a sense of harmony, allowing me to honor each part rather than have one part take all the space and push out the other.

With this awareness, I made time to go outside first thing. I was at peace as I was productive and felt kinder to my inner parts. I achieved this by practicing awareness and engaging in self-reflection. These practices helped me to better understand and appreciate the different parts of myself, leading to a greater sense of self-compassion.

With kindness and an Open Stance toward my various parts, I have found that I do not have to live so fully from one part. This realization liberates me from self-imposed expectations.

I have been focusing for some time on the power of being non-judgmental, compassionate, and kind to others. I know the benefit of shifting to being open with others and situations. When I focus on taking an Open Stance toward my inner parts, I experience a sense of aliveness and joy. This practice invigorates me, reminding me of the power of seeing and creating space for all of our parts. It is a learning journey that can create a ripple effect. When we are less critical and open toward all aspects of ourselves, we have more energy to be open to others. This sense of aliveness and joy is what I wish for you as you embark on your own journey of self-compassion and understanding.

I encourage you to embrace all of you and be compassionate to your inner parts. By doing so, you will feel more understood and accepted, both by yourself and by others. You will be a more effective leader.

What Supports a Fulfilling Life for You?

Have you been searching for a fulfilling life? What supports you on this journey? I have been exploring this question with leaders for quite a while, which has led to some valuable insights.

In our forthcoming book, JOYBeing: Connecting with the Essence and Rhythm of Life to Thrive and Inspire, my coauthor, Gila Seritcioglu, and I explore three essential pillars of a fulfilling and vibrant life: mindset, energy, and well-being. When embraced, these pillars become a roadmap for personal growth, supported by practical practices and tools designed to enhance our overall experience and sense of meaning.

Mindset: The Foundation of How We Engage with Life

Mindset shapes our approach to life. By cultivating curiosity, compassion, and presence, we develop the capacity to engage fully and empathetically with the world around us. An open and growth-oriented mindset encourages us to see challenges as opportunities for learning rather than obstacles to be feared. By being present in each moment, we open ourselves up to the richness of life, experiencing deeper connections with others and a greater sense of inner peace.

Energy: The Vital Force of Our Existence

Energy represents the vital force that fuels our physical, mental, and emotional vitality. It influences how we perceive and interact with our environment. By managing our energy intentionally, we can make more empowered choices. How we manage our energy directly impacts our ability to stay balanced and resilient in the face of life’s demands.

Wellbeing: The Holistic State of Thriving

Wellbeing encompasses a holistic thriving state across physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and relational dimensions. It is the culmination of a positive mindset and conscious energy management. By paying attention to and building habits that strengthen overall wellbeing, we can create a life that is not just about surviving but truly thriving. Resilience involves nurturing our bodies with proper nutrition and exercise, fostering meaningful relationships, and aligning our daily actions with our core values and purpose.

Transforming Daily Experiences

So, how can embracing these elements transform your daily experiences and interactions? Consider how a shift in mindset—from judgment and self-criticism to openness and self-compassion or from fear to curiosity—might change how you approach a difficult situation.

Imagine the impact of energy management on your productivity and relationships when you choose to replenish your energy through activities that nourish rather than deplete you. Reflect on how focusing on your wellbeing could lead you to make decisions that prioritize long-term fulfillment over short-term gratification.

When we attune to our mindset, manage our energy intentionally, and take action to support our wellbeing, we position ourselves to experience a deeper sense of aliveness and the joy of being—what we call JOYBeing.

Small Shifts Make a Big Difference

Many small shifts can make a significant difference. For example, you can build the muscle of looking for what is going well and what is possible rather than focusing on what is not working. Embracing a sense of gratitude and savoring moments of joy allows us to experience fulfillment. Making choices that protect your energy for what lights you up adds to your joy. Building habits such as nourishing relationships and friendships, focusing on your health, and listening to your emotions can profoundly impact you.

Share Your Insights

What have you found supports your sense of fulfillment? We’d love to hear your experiences and insights. We can explore the paths to a more fulfilling and vibrant life together.

The Power of Wonder

We cannot be in a state of wonder and also be judgmental. We have a desire for certainty, yet life is full of uncertainty. We are sure that we and others we love will die one day and that things will not remain the same. Otherwise, we cannot button down certainty. We can trip and fall or hear scary news anytime. We all have experienced such moments that change things in an instant. How do we live with this uncertainty?

We adopt an Open Stance as our way of being. We allow wonder, openness, and gratitude to be our companions. With wide-open eyes and arms, we appreciate the sky and the sun’s warmth on our backs. We appreciate the smile of a friend or a neighbor. We know that we are not alone on this journey of life. We embrace the moment before us and are grateful to be alive. Even when we face challenges that we wish would go away, we embrace the moment and trust that there is life and learning in the moment. We may even wonder, what is this moment offering, what can I learn? From the state of wonder, we connect to the inner aliveness that is always available. We sense life’s vitality and choose this moment and the next, fully present in the now. We are grateful for this experience and this growth. We call this connection to life, nature, and others the joy of being–JOYBeing.

Wonder is the spark that ignites our curiosity and fuels our desire to explore the world around us. It is the awe-inspiring feeling we experience when encountering something new, beautiful, or unexpected. Wonder has the power to:

– Expand Our Horizons: When we approach life with a sense of wonder, we open ourselves to new experiences and perspectives. We become more receptive to learning and growth.

– Inspire Creativity: Wonder stimulates our imagination and encourages us to think outside the box. It is the driving force behind innovation and artistic expression. When we allow ourselves to be captivated by the world’s mysteries, we tap into a wellspring of creative potential.

– Foster a Sense of Connection: Experiencing wonder often involves moments of connection with something greater than ourselves, whether it’s the beauty of nature, the intricacy of a piece of art, or the complexity of scientific discovery. These moments remind us that we are part of a larger tapestry of life, fostering a deeper sense of interconnectedness and reducing feelings of isolation.

For a more fulfilling life, it’s crucial to build the habit of taking an Open Stance and embracing wonder. A friend suggested we ask, “I wonder what this moment is inviting?” This simple question can empower us to take control of our mindset and approach life with a sense of openness and curiosity.

I would love to hear about your experience of wonder.

The Power of Connection: Building Friendships in a Disconnected World

“The need for connection and community is primal, as fundamental as the need for air, water and food.” -Dean Ornish

In recent conversations, I’ve noticed a recurring theme: many people, both young people and leaders, are finding it increasingly difficult to create and maintain friendships. This sense of isolation has been exacerbated by the pandemic, which disrupted our usual social rhythms and left many of us feeling more disconnected than ever. The US Surgeon General, Vivek Murthy released a public health advisory reporting the damaging health effects of loneliness and isolation. More than half of the US population experiences loneliness. With hope and courage, we can build meaningful relationships that enrich our lives.

The Challenge of Adult Friendships

While forming friendships seemed almost effortless during our school years, the same cannot be said for adult life. Many of us are working remotely, missing out on the casual interactions and spontaneous conversations that naturally occur in a shared workspace. This new reality has made it clear that we need to be more intentional about fostering connections.

The Importance of Real Conversations

In the leadership courses I facilitate, I encourage participants to engage in real conversations and to actively seek out connections. The relationships they form in breakout groups become a valuable support network. They often tell me how much they appreciate these interactions, which not only enrich their learning experience but also provide emotional and professional support.

I’ve personally made some of my closest friends through collaborative projects and group learning environments. Working together towards a common goal creates a bond that is both meaningful and enduring. Others find friendships through sports teams, hobby groups, or volunteering—activities that naturally bring people together.

Everyday Opportunities for Connection

Have you ever struck up a conversation with someone you just met at a conference, on a train, or in an elevator? Research shows that even these simple interactions can enliven and enrich our lives. Nicholas Epley, author of Mindwise: How We Understand What Others Think, Believe, Feel, and Want, highlights the benefits of offering a compliment or engaging in a conversation with a stranger. While we might think we prefer solitude, we actually benefit greatly from these small social connections.

Studies have demonstrated that social interactions, no matter how brief, can significantly improve our mood and overall wellbeing. A simple “hello” or a friendly smile can create a ripple effect, positively impacting not just your day but also the day of the person you interact with.

Practical Tips for Building Friendships

If you’re looking to build more meaningful connections in your life, here are some practical tips:

– Be Intentional: Make a conscious effort to reach out to people. Schedule regular catch-ups with colleagues or friends, even if it’s just a virtual coffee break. I have a few friends that I schedule regular conversations. It has strengthened the relationships.

– Join Groups or Clubs: Engage in activities that interest you. Whether it’s a book club, a sports team, or a hobby group, these settings provide a natural environment for forming friendships. I have made new friends recently in a Pilates class.

– Engage in Small Talk: Don’t underestimate the power of small talk. A casual conversation with a stranger can lift your spirits and create unexpected connections. I talk with my neighbors on elevators and at the grocery store. It helps me to feel more connected and brightens our day.

– Be Open and Vulnerable: Authenticity is key to forming meaningful relationships. Don’t be afraid to share your thoughts and feelings; vulnerability often leads to deeper connections. I try to be genuine and share what I am exploring or working on. We are all human and learning.

– Offer Compliments and Support: A kind word or a gesture of support can go a long way in building rapport and fostering a sense of community. Again, it’s important to be genuine. It’s helpful to hear what others find valuable. My day is made when someone says they benefitted from my book or course.

Take the Risk

In a world that often feels increasingly disconnected, taking the risk to engage in conversations and build connections is more important than ever. Remember, we are social creatures by nature, and we thrive on interaction. By reaching out and making an effort to connect, we not only enrich our own lives but also contribute positively to the lives of others. Know that relationships are essential for a fulfilling life and that we all benefit from connections.

Building and maintaining friendships as adults may require more effort, but the rewards are well worth it. From enhancing our emotional wellbeing to providing a support network, friendships play a crucial role in our lives. So, take the plunge, start a conversation, join a group, and embrace the power of connection.

Feel free to share your experiences or thoughts on building friendships in the comments below. Let’s continue this conversation and support each other in our journey towards greater connection and community.

How Do You Manage the Rhythm of Life?

“With equanimity, you can deal with situations with calm and reason while keeping your inner happiness.” -The Dalai Lama

I come from a big family, and there always seem to be challenges. The rhythm of life is comprised of fallow moments and times of flourishing. We can’t escape the ups and downs of life. However, we can work on managing our reactions. We can notice habitual patterns that may have once made sense but may no longer serve us. For example, a habitual pattern of jumping in and trying to control others may have made sense when we were younger, or striving for perfection may have been helpful to get good grades, but ten drafts of an email might not be the best use of our time and attention now.

Equanimity is the ability to be even-minded in facing life’s challenges. When we let experiences unfold and accept the transient nature of life, we become more flexible. Life naturally has disappointments. We can appreciate that our emotions continue to change, look for what we can learn, and trust our resilience and ability to thrive. This is an aspiration, and I have many experiences that allow me to develop the muscle of being open. It’s a work in progress, for sure.

We all want to experience a sense of inner calm and joy. When we intend to notice our judgments and shift to being open, we can be more responsive rather than reactive. When we make it a choice and practice to be open and experience equanimity, we influence others by our presence. We can learn to be calm when we notice our sensations and reactions. This serves us and those around us.

Embracing gratitude for who we are, what we have, and our lives is a powerful tool to navigate life’s twists and turns. It’s not just a practice, but a mindset that can bring a sense of peace and contentment, even in the face of challenges. Gratitude helps us to focus on the positive in our lives, shifting our perspective from what we lack to what we have.

There are many other practices that help us to manage disappointments and challenges. We can reflect and look for the growth opportunities. We can take care of our physical and emotional wellbeing. We can develop relationships where we share empathy, support and compassion.

What strategies do you find most helpful in navigating the rhythm of life’s ups and downs and challenges? Your experiences and insights are valuable and can contribute to our collective growth.

The Power of Joy in Leadership: Lessons from the Political Arena

People who have heard me emphasize the importance of joy have been reaching out to me this week. You may have noticed that the Democratic nominee for Vice President, Tim Walz, began his first address with, “Thank you for bringing back the joy!”

Regardless of your political stance, it’s crucial to recognize the power of joy, especially for leaders. Joy isn’t typically associated with politics, particularly in recent years marked by significant polarization.

Similarly, joy is often absent from our workplace discussions. In a world beset by complexities—conflicts, stress, relentless technological advancements, and rapid change—it’s easy to drift away from joy, that vibrant energy that is our birthright.

Reflecting on a time in my career when stress and responsibilities overwhelmed me, I initially dismissed joy as unattainable. However, a conscious effort to reconnect with joy through simple practices like gratitude journaling and mindful walks led to a profound personal transformation. This journey reinforced my belief in the transformative power of joy.

We can reconnect with joy, and doing so provides us with hope, energy, and the ability to see new possibilities. Experiencing joy in our bodies opens our hearts and encourages proactive action. Connecting with joy doesn’t mean becoming Pollyannish; instead, it allows us to perceive challenges as opportunities and mobilize energy for action.

Emotions are contagious. The palpable shift in enthusiasm within the Democratic campaign following President Biden’s difficult decision to step aside is a testament to this. Instead of feeling hopeless and defeated, there is a renewed sense of liveliness and possibility. This new focus inspires more people to join and ignites a collective drive to work towards something meaningful.

When leaders connect with their inner joy and convey a sense of hope, they inspire others and open up a world of possibilities. Our natural negativity bias makes it easy to see what is or could go wrong. However, we can connect with joy by recognizing this instinct and strengthening our ability to shift towards an Open Stance. We should never underestimate the power of joy. We can all be leaders within our spheres of influence. Research shows leaders and organizations that model and encourage joy are more productive and creative.

So, what are you noticing about joy these days? Take a moment to reflect on how you can cultivate more joy in your life and sphere of influence. Share your experiences and inspire others to do the same.

How Do You Self-regulate?

A coaching client asked to meet. His face was red, and his eyes narrowed as he told me, “I’m furious with my colleague. I cannot work with him any longer. His voice shook as he declared, “I am looking for another position.”

Of course, I listened and showed empathy to him as he shared the story of what happened. “You’re angry and frustrated… You feel betrayed and hurt.” After our meeting, the leader experienced a profound sense of relief and calmness. He could now see the situation from different perspectives, even recognizing his part in the interaction. He left with a plan for how to address the problem, no longer in a rush to leave the organization. In fact, he worked out the disagreement and continued to work effectively with his colleague after an open-minded conversation.

The key was being able to manage his emotions and judgments, see a wider perspective, and then engage in what I call OASIS Conversations.

We need to have the intention to be open-minded and take an Open Stance, and it is critical to manage our reactions so that we can be more responsive and more at choice.

One powerful way to self-regulate is to receive empathy from a friend or a trusted advisor. Equally important is to recognize and appreciate your own emotions and give yourself empathy. This self-awareness empowers you to take control of your reactions and responses.

We each need to find strategies that help us cool down and self-regulate when our emotions are strong. You may take a time-out and remind yourself to be open. You may listen to music, take a walk or dance, spend time in nature, or engage in an activity that nourishes you.

Emotionally intelligent leaders are more effective and create more engaged environments. Research shows that those who know how to control their strong emotions are more effective and experience more satisfaction.

I encourage you to notice what supports your self-regulation.

Learn more about how to self-regulate with this Open Stance reflection here: https://forms.aweber.com/form/69/1063828569.htm