We are collectively facing a tumultuous time in the world with war, climate disruptions, polarization, and financial and technological challenges. I ask myself, and others ask me, “How can we be grateful when so many are suffering?” It is an important question.

We must be empathetic, show compassion, and do our best to support those in need. Yet, paradoxically, fostering a sense of gratitude is equally imperative. While it feels counter-intuitive, we must also be grateful and appreciate all we have. We are interconnected, emotions are contagious, and our hope and optimism can ripple out to positively influence others. If we stay focused on what is not going well in the world, we don’t have the energy to find ways to make life better for ourselves and others.

One of the world’s leading scientific experts on gratitude, Robert Emmons, Ph.D., concurs that gratitude is indispensable. He articulates this perspective in an article for Greater Good:

“I have often been asked if people can—or even should—feel grateful under such dire circumstances. My response is that not only will a grateful attitude help—it is essential. In fact, it is precisely under crisis conditions when we have the most to gain by a grateful perspective on life. In the face of demoralization, gratitude has the power to energize. In the face of brokenness, gratitude has the power to heal. In the face of despair, gratitude has the power to bring hope. In other words, gratitude can help us cope with hard times.”

Acknowledging the challenges inherent in life, we recognize that suffering is an inevitable part of the human experience. Hopefully, we grow through these challenges and see many of them as opportunities and experience moments of transformation.

According to Emmons: “Trials and suffering can actually refine and deepen gratefulness if we allow them to show us not to take things for granted. Our national holiday of gratitude, Thanksgiving, was born and grew out of hard times. The first Thanksgiving took place after nearly half the pilgrims died from a rough winter and year. It became a national holiday in 1863 in the middle of the Civil War and was moved to its current date in the 1930s following the Depression.”

The celebration of Thanksgiving is a testament to the enduring power of gratitude to sustain us through hardship. As we navigate these tumultuous times, I am grateful for our connection.

I wish you hope, gratitude, and a joyful Thanksgiving.

It’s counter-intuitive; our instinct is to protect ourselves and to duck for safety when the dust is flying amid a time of uncertainty and polarization. However, doing the opposite and taking an Open Stance can be transformative.

We can recognize our instinct to close down, judge, and control. Rather than assuming negative intent of others, we can choose to be curious and assume positive intent first. Imagine the impact it could have on our relationships and interactions. When a colleague proposes a new idea, don’t immediately dismiss it and question their motives. If you assumed the person was genuinely trying to improve things, you would enhance the atmosphere of trust and collaboration, leading to more positive and productive outcomes.

We can look for what is working rather than what is not working. Rather than focus on the challenges and obstacles you face on a project, focus on building on what is already effective and let yourself be more solution-oriented, seeing the possibilities and opportunities for growth.

We can choose optimism and aliveness over pessimism and despair. Emotions are contagious, and when we select optimism, the positivity creates a ripple effect for those around us.

An Open Stance is the best offense. Yes, it’s counter-intuitive. When learning to swim, we instinctively raise our head above the water to breathe. However, when swimmers learn to lower their heads in the water, they become much more efficient and faster. They learn how to counteract their initial instinct.

We can also learn to shift to being open, and with this lens, we are positioned to see more possibilities and make more optimal decisions. With an Open Stance, we can engage in positive and productive OASIS-like conversations. Our perspective broadens, and we can be more resilient. We can build the neural pathways and habits that enable joy and aliveness.

With an Open Stance, we are resilient, unlock the power of connection, and are richly rewarded. We experience and foster a greater sense of belonging and psychological safety. We benefit from connecting with our colleagues, family, and community. We widen our circle of influence and are positioned to make a difference-which is the essence of leadership and a quality the world needs more of today.

So, embrace the power of an Open Stance and watch how it transforms your connections and world.

In these tumultuous times, I have been reflecting on what I can do. The challenges we face are complex, with a myriad of perspectives and needs. It’s easy to question the impact of individual actions, wondering if they are just drops in an insurmountable bucket.

Many of us grapple with how we can make a meaningful difference in our workplaces, families, and communities. One simple yet valuable response we can each embrace is to be compassionate and kind and to spread a sense of connection rather than feed polarization. We can take an Open Stance when we want to close down.

We can acknowledge our shared humanity and that most people are doing the best they can based on their unique life experiences. Life is laden with challenges, but it’s also a canvas for growth and transformation.

A useful practice is to pause, focus on, and slow down our breath for a few moments. We can put attention on our heart. As we do, we can bring to mind someone or something we appreciate or care about– a child, a friend, a tree, a pet, or a serene place in nature. In this moment, allow feelings of compassion and kindness to grow. Then, turn that sense of compassion and kindness toward yourself. That’s right. Be kind and compassionate toward yourself, too. Experience this expanded state of being.

With this openness, we are ready to extend the same warmth and consideration to those we encounter as well as others across the globe. We can lend an empathetic ear to someone undergoing a challenging time, contribute our time or resources to a worthy cause, or simply share a smile and a word of thanks with the barista at the local coffee shop, a neighbor, or a colleague. In our mind’s eye, we can envision a ripple of kindness and compassion radiating to other drivers on the road or people strolling along a path or in another part of the world.

Indeed, our efforts are tiny drops in a vast ocean of need. However, from our place of openness, our kindness touches others and spreads the enlivening energy that is so needed.

In times of complexity, the simplicity of compassion and kindness is a force of power. Clear intention and even little acts can create a wave of positive change. It is something each of us can do now–even when we don’t know what to do.

A leader shared that he was surprised when the barista told him another customer had paid for his morning cappuccino. This small act enriched his day, and he felt light in his heart and steps the whole day. He admitted that he was kinder to people and greeted more neighbors.

I called a friend I lost touch with to say hello and see how she was doing. I had put off calling, assuming it could be awkward and believing I was too busy. I was glad to reconnect, and I received a text from the person thanking me for reaching out and how it lifted her spirits. Often, small actions make people feel valued.

We can reflect on something nice we can do for someone. It doesn’t need much time, effort, or resources but could make someone’s day. Then, do it without expecting anything in return. True kindness comes from a genuine desire to make someone’s day better. However, kind acts seem to spread positivity.

Observe the impact on your mood. It just may make your day more enjoyable!

In a world characterized by uncertainty and increasing polarization, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed and unsure how to respond effectively. Many of us find ourselves wondering how we can truly make a difference in such a complex landscape.

Amid these challenges, I recently participated in a monthly Open Stance Circle gathering via Zoom. Taking an Open Stance is about noticing when we are contracted, in judgment, controlling, or closed and with awareness shifting to being curious, compassionate, courageous, kind, and noticing possibilities. From this Open Stance, we can attend to the world with greater resilience and wellbeing to embrace the present moment while unlocking our full potential.

After a short reflection, each person in the gathering shared their experiences of moving from a closed stance to an open one and the remarkable impact it had on their interactions. It is inspiring to hear how the act of acknowledging our initial reactions and choosing to be open can utterly transform our relationships and conversations with colleagues and neighbors. Even when we encounter individuals with differing perspectives, we can sense when someone is genuinely open and attentive.

Our society has conditioned many of us to place a premium on being “right.” However, within the Open Stance Circle, we experienced the benefit of being in an environment where people are open, attentive, and nonjudgmental. We must create more places where people feel safe expressing themselves and exploring many possibilities. Participants in the Open Stance Circle reported the power of being in such a community with an energy that is shaping their lives.

The beauty of this practice lies in its scalability. We all have the power to create this kind of Open Stance environment in our families, communities, and workplaces. We can each make a meaningful difference in the world by fostering intention and energy that prioritizes openness. This is a small but vital step we can make in today’s complex landscape, a reminder that we must remain open to one another, especially when our perspectives seem worlds apart.

You are welcome to participate in Open Stance Circle: https://potentials.com/open-stance-community/

Can you recall being outside on a beautiful sunny day, seeing the blue sky, and noticing that you are glad to be alive? You let yourself experience the moment of basking in the sunshine, feeling the breeze, and hearing the joyful sound of birds. You are present. You are not worrying about the future or fretting about the past. Notice what happens in your body as you experience this moment. We experience joy and aliveness in the present moment.

Observe children at a playground or zoo. They naturally know how to bask in the present moment. They don’t have a lot of past to regret and have not learned to worry about the future yet. As we grow older and life becomes more complex, it is easy to lose our sense of wonder and excitement about the world. The good news is that we can regain this energy and excitement by building the habit of being in the present moment. When we live in the present moment, we can experience life at a deeper, more meaningful, and joyful level.

We experience reality and authentic connection in the present moment. A participant in my leadership class shared that he often would think about an email he needed to write or reflect on an interaction with a colleague when eating a home-cooked meal. Only when his wife asked him if he liked the meal did he realize he was eating and what the food tasted like. He missed the experience of the delicious food as well as a real connection with his family. When he consciously tried to be present, taste his food, and experience the family connections, he felt a genuine sense of aliveness and connection. He noted that this was a new, joyful experience for him. He is not alone. Too often, we miss experiencing the joy of our present moments because we are distracted and focused on reflecting on the past or worrying about the future.

Our lives are taking place in the present moment. When not experiencing the present moment, we miss the joy of our relationships and experiences.

Of course, it is difficult to be present when we are faced with uncertainty and challenges all around us. While we may want to hide or lash out, when we are present with our sensations, thoughts, and emotions and what is happening, we can also be present with others. Our emotions influence others, and our attention and presence is a gift. It may seem like a small gesture, but connecting with our joy and aliveness enables us to connect with others, which can make a difference.

When another is present with us, we experience a sense of connection, aliveness and joy–something we all need these days. I wish you the experience of presence and JOYBeing–the joy of being alive.

Can you recall a time when you were not focused on an endless list of to-dos and experienced the joy of life through your senses? Some of us may recall childhood when we had space to explore and create with a sense of freedom. For others, we may remember listening to music we enjoy, connecting with nature, or admiring a work of art. You may enjoy doodling, painting or making a collage.

I have always enjoyed art even though I never felt I had the talent or time to explore building art skills. I admire friends who are creative and engaged in regular art projects. I started drawing simple cartoons for my blog. I allowed myself to enjoy the process and did not focus on the outcome – which made it fun. (You may notice that I am definitely an amateur.) However, I have enjoyed creating a little space for art. It has enhanced my sense of JOYBeing – the joy of being alive. I hope to learn more about art and make it an integral part of my life.

In Your Brain on Art, authors Susan Magsamen and Ivy Ross show how activities from painting and dancing to expressive writing, architecture, and more are essential to our lives.

Magsamen and Ross share research that shows how engaging in an art project for as little as forty-five minutes reduces the stress hormone cortisol, no matter your skill level, and just one art experience per month can extend your life by ten years! They show how playing music enhances learning and builds cognitive skills; attuning to the vibrations of a tuning fork creates sound waves to counteract stress; and interactive exhibits dissolve the boundaries between art and viewers, engaging all of our senses and strengthening memory. In addition to prescribing forest bathing, where people are encouraged to spend time in nature, doctors are now suggesting museum visits to address loneliness, dementia, and many other physical and mental health concerns.

Engaging in art, whether we are doodling, coloring, working with clay, or simply experiencing art, can enhance the quality of our lives. Art can create a sense of community and support our health. I encourage you to add a few weekly minutes to engage with your senses, expand your wellbeing, and possibly extend your longevity.

What can you do this week to enliven your senses and enjoy connecting with the arts? I would love to hear your experience and what you notice.

What went well today? Review your day and identify a few things. For example, here are some things I enjoyed today.

— I got outside for a walk along Lake Michigan, and it was a beautiful day with a breeze. I love walking and being in nature.
— I enjoyed lunch with my partner. It was nutritious and tasty. We had a good conversation and connection.
— I listened to a book and explored joy, an area of interest, and learned about some of the latest research.
— I connected via a phone conversation to support my sister and siblings through a challenge.

Consider your meaningful moments. Then ask yourself, “What supported these moments?”

For each, I made a choice. Each supports my values and what is meaningful for me to experience joy. I connected with nature; I walked and ate nourishing food to support my health. I supported my sister in need and connected with my siblings. I want to make a difference and help to make lives better. I love learning and sharing what I learn and value studying the latest research. I value my relationship with my family and am glad for moments of connection.

Notice that we can always make decisions that enhance our JOYBeing–the joy of being alive. When we know what we value and what is meaningful, our choices become easier.

Make it a practice to notice meaningful moments in your day. You could reflect or journal in the evening or the next morning.

It took me years to write my first book, OASIS Conversations. It was an ardent goal of mine, yet I always seemed to have other things to do first. Granted, the demands of a young child, elderly parents, a full-time business, and extensive global travel for work kept me occupied. While the desire to write and share the book burned within me, I often found myself waiting for a bolt of inspiration.

Research suggests that roughly 80% of us procrastinate while we wait for the motivation to spur us into action to achieve a goal or get something done. It looks like we have it all backward. If we actually begin to take action, it is then that we garner the motivation and energy to continue working on a task or project. When we procrastinate, we are waiting for motivation or energy to proceed. When we initiate an action rather than procrastinate, we often find the energy and inspiration to proceed. It’s a subtle yet crucial mindset shift.

Envision taking the smallest step in tidying your home, writing a report, or starting a new project. Notice what happens when taking the initial step. I’ve noticed that if I start a project within a short time, I often garner the energy and inspiration to carry it through to completion.

Another element that has helped me to get things done is to be accountable to a friend or colleague. We benefit from extrinsic motivation. For instance, I’ve discovered that knowing I will be sharing my work with a colleague or group can be a powerful motivator. Sometimes, it spurs me into action just in the nick of time. The commitment to someone else can provide the spur of energy to overcome inertia.

I have also found that having a slot marked on my calendar for writing, exercise, or even household chores provides the space and a routine for getting these things done. Of course, setting priorities and putting some things aside have been useful, too.

What strategies have you found to help you to get things done? Your insights and experiences may offer keys to unlocking motivation and productivity that help us progress from waiting for inspiration to actively igniting it.

Joy’s soul lies in the doing. — Shakespeare

I’ve been exploring how to experience joy with coaching clients and leaders in my courses.

It’s not the destination but the journey. No doubt you’ve heard this cliché. However, it is scientifically supported. In the book The Happiness Hypothesis, Jonathan Haidt explores the “progress principle.” He concludes that we get more pleasure and satisfaction from progressing toward our goals than actually achieving them.

Many of us have experienced the treadmill of pursuing goals relentlessly. Whether striving for a promotion, gaining acceptance into a prestigious college, completing a challenging project, or buying a house, we often anticipate achieving these objectives will lead to lasting happiness. However, we soon discover that the pleasure we expected quickly fades, and we’re back on the treadmill, pursuing the next goal. It can feel like the mythological Sisyphus endlessly pushing a boulder up a hill.

Happiness researchers like Iris Mauss conclude that those who relentlessly pursue happiness as their end goal often experience less satisfaction than those who savor the journey. Rather than chase happiness, we need to embody practices that support us in experiencing joy in the process of living.

Rather than focus externally, it is helpful to appreciate our innate sense of JOYBeing–the simple joy of being alive that we can connect with throughout our days and life’s journey. Shifting our focus to enjoying our days and working toward our goals can be transformative. We can experience joy in many moments, even in the face of challenges, by seeking opportunities for learning and growth.

Making the conscious choice to shift our perspective and prioritize JOYBeing as we journey through life is a practice and habit that can be cultivated. By doing so, we enhance our wellbeing and discover that the journey itself is a destination worth celebrating. So, why wait to reach the summit when we can find joy in every step of the climb?