What’s Your Story?

Posted on February 26, 2021 by Ann Van Eron

We are always making assumptions about others, ourselves and our situations. We naturally create stories based on our past experiences as a way of ensuring our safety.

David, a manager, shared with me that team members did not support his ideas and were out to make him look bad. He felt frustrated. With this story, he worked harder to demonstrate his expertise and how he was correct in his proposals. However, the harder he worked to demonstrate he was right, the less he seemed able to inspire people to listen and align around a strategy.

When we “know” we are right and feel such frustration and contraction, we need to stop and take a look at the story we are telling ourselves. We could say to ourselves or a coach or friend, “The story I am telling myself is . . . that my colleagues are not interested in what I have to say and that they are even against me.” Then we can assess what is a true fact or observation and what is our assumption or judgment. It is true that team members questioned the findings. They asked, “How did you arrive at that conclusion?” Is it true that they are against you? This is more likely your story and your self-fulfilling prophecy.

The more David believed his colleagues were against him, the more he pushed for his ideas with the leader and others and the less he involved his colleagues in his process. It was his internal story that they were against him that ironically influenced his moves that alienated him. We can only control ourselves and not others. (And managing ourselves is not easy.)

When David became aware of his role in the tangle, he was able to take the first moves to listen and include colleagues in his thinking process during development and to show that he was a team player. He reflected on what he appreciated about team members and became more caring toward them. He was able to forge a more positive and healthy dynamic.

By questioning our stories and separating facts from assumptions, we are better positioned to create more positive and productive relationships and unparalleled results.

Contagion: What are You Spreading?

Posted on June 7, 2019 by Ann Van Eron

We’ve heard about how measles are spreading at rapid speed significantly influencing communities. In a similar way emotions are contagious.

In a study a group of nurses were asked to keep a daily log of their mood, work challenges and the overall emotional climate of their team. After three weeks, the researchers could significantly predict the mood of the entire team based on the positive or negative mood of any one nurse. The emotional contagion occurred when the moods were influenced by those outside of work and when the nurses only spent a few hours a day together. Overtime, a mood can spread through an organization and greatly influence the culture.

Another study showed that just witnessing another person who is stressed can cause stress to a person. That’s kind of scary given how many people are stressed these days. However, another study suggests that worrying about being stressed may be a real killer. In a study with thirty thousand participants people who had a lot of stress but didn’t worry about being stressed lived longer. Those who had a lot of stress and believed it was hurting them were over 40% more likely to die after eight years. Other studies suggest that we need some stress to support growth and seeing it as positive may help people to live longer. People who retire and don’t engage are more likely to live less.

Given emotional contagion, how can we accept stress as a part of life and realize that it can even support focusing and longevity? How can we more consciously create a positive mood for ourselves and those around us? A simple step is to be aware of your mood and to reflect on what you are grateful for.

Recognize that your mood is influencing others and see how you can be more open and positive.

Expand Your Vision

Posted on May 22, 2019 by Ann Van Eron

I often work with clients to clarify what is most important to them to ensure they are actualizing their values. We have so many decisions to make regarding how to spend our time, energy and resources. Given the fast pace of change and our need to be agile, we are served when we are clear about what is most important to us and our larger goals or vision.

I recently had the opportunity of hearing about the vision of the Basque region of Spain to become known internationally as a center for advanced manufacturing and social inclusion. Industry generates 29.9% of its GDP. Their focus on manufacturing comes from a vision and strategy to ensure excellent health and education systems for their citizens. They have developed an integrated training and education system that is recognized as a best practice in the European Union.

Their vision to focus on human development and manufacturing has enabled various businesses, and public and private organizations to work together effectively. Together with a shared vision, they have positively influenced their citizens and are now sharing their learning across different communities to make an even bigger difference.

It can be challenging to create a vision within an organization and even more challenging in a city or community where people have different interests. However, the collective effort to work toward shared visions is greatly needed these days and can be quite rewarding.

According to the April Gordon Report (www.Imperialcorp.com), in the US over 10 million jobs remain vacant where there is growing unrest among Americans who are unemployed or underemployed. The changes in technology make the need for more public-private partnerships and broader visions to understand changes in the labor market demands and the needed changes in education.

I meet many people who want to make a difference amidst the wide range of challenges. We need to focus on systemic change. These larger goals require vision and the ability to be open and engage in dialogue.

Consider your purpose and how you can convene and collaborate with others to make an impact.

Listen to Connect Not Correct

Posted on April 5, 2019 by Ann Van Eron

“What is he thinking? What a terrible idea! Does he see how he is going to hurt the staff and the company?” This is what Trish told me she was thinking as her boss shared a new idea that he thought would save money and address a big problem.

Trish had immediately told her boss why the idea would not work. She was surprised that he could not see the foolishness of his solution. Unfortunately, Trish was not successful in influencing her boss to consider other options and in addition, their relationship soured.

What happened? Trish immediately identified what she believed was wrong with her manager’s idea and began arguing her point of view. She did what we all do often. We focus on correcting or rejecting an idea before we ensure that we are listening fully and connecting with the person speaking. We need to manage ourselves and make sure we understand that the other person is saying and also identify how they are feeling by providing empathy. For example, Trish could have said, “You are concerned about the problem and believe this solution will address the challenge and address the budget deficit too.” Her boss would have felt heard and been more open to a conversation. Because he felt judged he became closed to a genuine conversation of exploring options and also became closed to Trish.

Notice your response when you hear ideas you don’t agree with (give yourself empathy) and stop and shift to being curious and open. Focus on listening more intently, share what you have heard, give empathy and be open to learning more.

Be an Ally

Posted on March 28, 2019 by Ann Van Eron

Jenny excitedly told me how happy she was about a meeting she participated in. She was a bit intimidated by the caliber of participants and was a bit hesitant to speak up, particularly since she is an introvert. We have all had that feeling of hesitancy. She took the risk and suggested a unique idea. The ideas continued to flow from people and no one commented on hers. Then, a colleague said, “I would like to comment on Jenny’s brilliant suggestion….”

Her colleague did a number of things: she gave credit to Jenny for her idea by noting it and appreciated the contribution. Then she built on the idea. This supported Jenny in feeling a part of the group and it created an environment for all to contribute and take such risks.

Jenny actually wrote a note of thanks to her colleague who then confessed that she felt intimidated in the meeting and that she would always “have her back.” Trust was enhanced and the two are on their way to a friendship of supporting each other.

Can you take the simple step of noticing and calling out someone’s idea that contributes to the team and then appreciate such allies who are supportive?

What is Your Aspiration?

Posted on September 28, 2018 by Ann Van Eron

Change

Be the change you wish to see in the world. — Gandhi

Our language influences how we interpret and experience things. I purposely first ask people their aspirations rather than their goals or expectations. A different part of the brain is activated when we are envisioning. We are more open and see more possibilities. Then, there is a place for clarifying goals and the next actions to move toward the aspiration.

Emotions are contagious and it is easy to feel anxious and want to rush to solutions. Often in conversations, we jump to solutions before fully listening. We push ourselves and others to commit to action for results. In fact, many of us seem wired for action and we certainly have been rewarded in the workplace for committing to action. As a coach and team facilitator, I work to stay open and inspire people to dream of what is possible. By my questions and presence with clients, the space is set for such dreaming.

I realize that I do not always hold this same space with myself or my teenage daughter. My own worry about her succeeding can make me jump to proposed actions. “How is your studying going? What are you doing for your college applications?” She does not feel my positive affirmation in these moments. In fact, I do have positive aspirations for her but my own worry and push for action can get in the way. I regret that I have missed opportunities with her the way leaders I coach have missed opportunities for connecting and envisioning with their teams.

When I worked with a leadership team that was experiencing challenges in the marketplace, I was able to share my excitement about what is possible for the organization and encourage them to dream of what they could co-create. They joined together to create a compelling vision and they also left with concrete priorities and actions. Each leader agreed to carry the excitement and questions about what could be possible back to their teams. After a few days, the whole energy of the organization was lifted and new possibilities emerged. It is amazing to see the transformation when we are reflecting on our aspirations of what is possible rather than what is not going well and what we don’t want.

Be sure to give yourself space to reflect on what you most aspire and to connect with what brings you meaning. Then identify goals and next steps. Also, be an inspiration for others and engage them in dialogue about what is possible. This kind of conversation is needed more than ever these days when it is so easy for people to feel disheartened and out of control.

What is Your Urgent Need for Transformation?

Posted on September 20, 2018 by Ann Van Eron

What’s wrong with these people? Don’t they see the stock price is tanking? How do I get people to move? How do we turn this ship around? Will we make it?

Often leaders are frustrated when they sense that things are not moving fast enough or that there is not enough energy to create lasting change. How do they enhance the co-creation and action for results?

They often try to instill urgency by making staff changes. However, this can create more fear and uncertainty rather than engendering co-creation and collaboration. Other times, leaders resort to platitudes such as “the train is leaving, get on or off now.” Again, while these statements may promote short-term compliance, they do not seem to sustain commitment and action.

The challenge is that leaders generally are seeing things from a different perspective and need to engage in open-minded conversations with their teams. A leader needs to clearly share the urgent need for transformation while understanding the needs of team members.

I have worked with many leaders who have been able to share their view and listen to the perspectives of their colleagues and then create shared meaning and a vision that inspires action for change. The value of taking some time for real conversation cannot be overestimated. Unfortunately, some feel they are too busy to engage in these essential and transformational conversations.

When all the voices are heard (initially through pre-meeting interviews) and a respectful and open environment is created, the urgency and focus emerges. An honest dialogue about the current situation and needs, without making people wrong, provides space to imagine what is possible. You can engage people to create a shared vision and a concrete plan for action. The powerful energy available when a shared sense of meaning is created is inspiring. The team can tap into a creative energy for change and then there is urgency and the excitement of working collectively for a shared goal. Rather than getting on the train, the team is forging a new path together with all the energy of experienced hikers and they bring along the rest of the organization. Mobilizing such energy is what makes being a leader and a part of an organization exciting.

After working with a leadership team to align around a shared vision the leader shared that a senior hire candidate indicated that he was excited to see the alignment of the senior team and wanted to join in the exciting venture. They had not been able to hire for the critical position before the team had engaged in open-minded dialogue and co-created a shared plan to urgently create changes in their business. Their energy and excitement after facilitated dialogue was contagious and extended throughout the organization. There is nothing like the power of engaged hearts and minds tapping into creativity. The results followed.

We love supporting leaders in deepening their ability to do this. It’s fun and rewarding for everyone. One way we support leaders with this is in working with them to create a Transformational Leadership Retreat. We’d love you to join us at our next seminar, in which we share the 6-question coaching model we use for leaders and their teams.

Creating urgency and powerful meaning is one of the topics we discuss in Use Your Next Leadership Retreat to Launch a Transformation: Learn the Process September 24 from 12 – 4:30 at the Catalyst Ranch in Chicago. Learn more here.

Jackie Sloane and Ann Van Eron are seasoned executive coaches, and work together with leaders to create transformational interventions and retreats for public sector, corporate, privately-held and not-for-profit entities.

The Transformational Power of Alignment

Posted on September 14, 2018 by Ann Van Eron

Alignment

“We don’t talk with each other.” “The leaders each have their own fiefdom.” “Our stock price is tanking and we are fighting each other.” “We have too many priorities.” “Nothing is being done well.” “What are we trying to do?”

It is not uncommon to find leaders each operating with their own assumptions in an effort to create success. However, given their different backgrounds and experiences each focuses on what he or she deems is most important. Often energy is wasted and the price of misalignment is high. It is costly for the leaders and even more so for those reporting to them.

I assume you have experienced the frustration, decreased energy and commitment drain when you have worked in a system where you believe the leaders are misaligned, not listening and the direction is unclear. On the other hand, there is increased creativity and innovation and success seems to flow when there is open-mindedness and alignment.

What can you do? I suggest three steps:

Schedule a transformational retreat
Collect perspectives
Engage in dialogue for alignment

Schedule a transformational retreat

Devoting time for dialogue and connection is useful when a team or an organization is newly formed. It is great to define expectations and agreements and support a positive beginning. When changes are going to be introduced, it is helpful to ensure that leaders are on the same page and speaking the same language. A merger, reorganization or a new leader or a significant change, each create uncertainty and the need for alignment and dialogue. While it can be challenging to find a date, it is useful to announce the intention to create a positive environment for dialogue and alignment.

Collect perspectives

As part of my work facilitating a leadership team retreat I speak with each member of the team and other key stakeholders before we all meet. It is amazing how different the perspectives are on what is happening and what should be done. Each person is seeing the environment and the situation from their vantage point. The marketing person shares her concern about how the competition is gaining market share and poaching key people and emphasizes the need to invest in facilities and promotion. The finance person talks about market share and the need to reduce expenses. The technology leader believes that the company can be transformed by investing in new processes. The business line heads may hope to acquire other businesses or grow their business.

Often each person also complains about what others are doing or not doing and what the leader should do. Each believes that he or she is right. And it is clear that they don’t all see the whole situation.

Most of the time the leaders are busy with their function or business lines and have not had the space or support to genuinely step back and assess the best direction for the enterprise given changing conditions. The value of a retreat is that all the views can be put on the table in an open atmosphere. Leaders can collectively step back from their own day-to-day challenges and look at the larger picture together. In the process, they get to know one another more and learn skills.

As a team and executive coach, I use the interviews before the retreat as an opportunity to coach and challenge leaders to try new behaviors and explore other perspectives.

Engage in dialogue for alignment

With the support of a facilitator/coach the various views can be surfaced and explored in the context of developing a shared strategy. Engaging in open-minded dialogue strengthens the team by enhancing trust.

I like to jumpstart retreats by sharing the multiple perspectives regarding the business and how the team is working. I share that it is natural that participants have different perspectives and encourage the group not to make each other wrong. Participants want the organization to succeed and need to see that they rise and fall together in the same boat. By sharing the findings from interviews upfront, people know that the issues are on the table and they can get to work to clarify their vision and priorities. I also work with teams to clarify their criteria for decision- making and what they will postpone or not do. This can be one of the most challenging conversations. In addition to aligning on the strategy and priorities, the team focuses on being open-minded and how to engage in positive and productive conversations. Participants listen and give empathy to one another. They experience a new way of interacting and co-creating agreements. I teach participants the OASIS Conversations process that supports them in being open-minded and curious and creating understanding and agreements. Participants agree on the kind of culture they will inspire together.

The transformational experience is unforgettable. When people come together to work on a shared goal and support one another, it is exciting and worthwhile. Leaders realize that they can achieve goals and make a difference together.

When team members leave a meeting aligned on their vision, strategy, priorities, processes and values they are prepared to lead together. They agree on structures and practices to ensure sustainable success. The alignment is palpably experienced by others and can be communicated across the organization.

How aligned is your team and are they engaged in open-minded conversations?

How to create alignment is one of the topics we discuss in Use Your Next Leadership Retreat to Launch a Transformation: Learn the Process September 24 from 12 – 4:30 at the Catalyst Ranch in Chicago. Learn more here.

What Conversations are Needed for Transformation?

Posted on August 8, 2018 by Ann Van Eron

Conversations

Don’t underestimate the power of open-minded conversations.

If you are like most organizations and leaders, you are experiencing disruption. You are experiencing pressure from within and outside your company. You are introducing new technology, you are facing greater competition, you have changes in leadership and focus. You worry about engagement and having the right talent. You need people to think and behave in a different way to achieve challenging goals. Sometimes it is a matter of life or death for the future of the enterprise.

For example, an organization we worked with experienced a merger where very different cultures joined. There were conflicts among leaders about where to spend resources and devote energy. There were different perceptions about what was needed with different demands from senior leadership and the external clients. The misalignment and conflicts were felt throughout the system.

We spoke with the leaders to understand their perspectives and brought them together for open-minded dialogue. They needed to align as a leadership team and organization to make a real difference for clients and to survive in the increasingly pressured marketplace.

First, the leadership team needed to build trust. This was not easy. However, once the different perspectives were shared and each identified what they needed to feel respected they found common ground and that they could see themselves as the team to succeed.

They created a shared vision and aligned around where they would focus energy.

They found synergies when they stopped fighting one another. They agreed on their roles and responsibilities and developed processes such as cadences for how they would communicate with each other and the organization.

They clarified the kind of culture they wanted and the mindset and behaviors they expected. They agreed to move from competing with each other to achieving together. They planned to move from each group acting as an island to finding and benefitting from synergies. They planned to move from excluding to respectful inclusion and dialogue. They agreed to say “we” rather than “they” when referring to each other.

There is great power in bringing a leadership team together for dialogue. Open-minded conversations are essential for transformation. No matter how compelling the need for change, it requires real understanding and agreement on how to co-create a future together. Too much energy is wasted when there is talking at one another or polite talk. There needs to be genuine understanding, alignment and agreements. Of course, the conversations need to continue among the leadership team and throughout the system.

Conversations are key to creating a shared vision and culture to achieve goals. Don’t underestimate the power of conversations for transformation. How are you promoting transformational conversations?

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Please join us for a free, introductory Zoom online webinar on Leading the Transformational Retreat, on August 23rd @ 12:30 pm Central Time.

https://bit.ly/2M9x6O6

In this program, we will hear your challenges, offer insights and share a powerful coaching model we use to support leaders and others in creating, launching and sustaining transformation in their organizations. We will also answer questions about our upcoming half-day, live, in-person seminar program September 24th in Chicago on supporting leaders in creating, launching, and managing culture change.

Make Time for Conversations in the Face of Urgency

Posted on June 22, 2018 by Ann Van Eron

Conversations

People are not pulling their weight. I am replacing my team members. I am disappointed in what people are achieving. I feel I am carrying the weight of the challenge on my shoulders. I don’t have time for conversations or to develop people. I need to be successful or my tenure is at risk.

The disruptions in the marketplace and sense of urgency are resulting in many shifts in leadership and a sense of uncertainty. Often the magnitude of change and need for transformation are so apparent to leaders that they sense they don’t have time for real conversations. However, without open-minded conversations everyone is operating with their own assumptions and a lot of energy is wasted on guessing, resistance and defensiveness that could be directed to solving challenges. People start focusing on who may be let go next and their creative energy is drained. The opportunities for synergy are missed.

I know, it feels hard to create time when you are so busy with meetings and planning. Plus, you sense it may not be worth the effort.

There is nothing more exciting than working together to achieve a challenge that seems almost impossible. This requires a sense of trust and open-minded conversations. When I ask people to share peak team experiences they recount times when the odds against succeeding seemed slim, yet a team of people focused on a common vision, used their strengths, communicated effectively and creatively won the prize.

Executive Coaching clients often report that conversations with team members and staff make all the difference. The air is cleared, multiple perspectives are shared and people can align and conquer challenges together. They agree on where to focus and save energy by building positive and productive relationships.

In the face of urgency and the need for transformation, make time for Open-minded conversations.

“Keep your mind open to opportunities. They are closer than you think.”—Anonymous